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today i woke up and i was crying. the dream was vague but it had something to do with my parents disappointed in me. my mom tried to give me shiny goldfish stickers to make me feel better and i hugged her around her waist. the dream forshadowed what happened this morning. like always, my whole family was too lazy to go to Church and my mom didnt want to go. i told her that i havent gone in a long time and i really wanted to attend. she then started accusing me with her usual "you just want to go to see friends." "why cant you be this passionate about studying rather than wasting it on planning on things to do for fun" on the car she then called me selfish and coldhearted. she said i planned a whole day for cheryl's birthday but forgot that it was my dads birthday too (i didnt forget.. i wished him a happy birthday). she said "while you and your friends were downstairs laughing your dad and i were upstairs trying to put up your broken curtains (they fell apart yesterday). "DONT YOU APPRECIATE ANYTHING WE DO FOR YOU?" thats when i broke down to tears and she said "stop crying youre not a child anymore." my eyes were puffy that day for Church.
happy belated birthday cheryl. im glad you liked the surprise dinner that jess and i planned *cough* without steph and val *cough* i took out my braids from cancun. it looks like i crimped certain parts of my hair tryouts are tomorrow. im going to die. i dont even have my racket. kurt is restringing it today and dropping it off in the evening. pray for me please... one more week of summer. screw you school and junior year. leave me alone |
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